I was carrying a dirty secret last week. I had started to make myself throw up after allowing myself to overeat during late day meals. I wasn't talking about it because I was embarassed and ashamed, but I had an incredibly wonderful friend confront me about it. It was exactly what I needed. I can't thank her enough for caring enough and having the balls enough to do that. I then began to open up about it and used my support system to start paving the way to overcoming it. I have asked for some personal time with my personal trainer this weekend to discuss it with her. This is a big step for me, I have never disclosed this struggle I've had for the past few months with her at all. But I know she will guide me to right support system and help me overcome it. I guess it's something I should have done awhile ago.
It's quite a viscious cycle. You feel out of control and you actually get to a point where you justify it. This week, I've just been taking small steps to get back on track. I haven't overeaten in 3 days and I've worked out Mon and Wed. I overslept yesterday or I would have been at my step and flex class. I feel good, not 100% yet, but things are on the right path.
I got to spend a wonderful evening with my boyfriend last night. It's kind of weird to say that. And tonight, I get to spend with my brother and am way excited. We're going to dinner and the to the Fall Out Boy concert at the Tacoma Dome. It should be fun. I am more excited to spend time with Mitch than the concert. :) Life is good. I have the best friends in the world and they have helped me get through this rough patch. Thank you!!
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Thursday, June 21, 2007
Burnt Out
This last week has been difficult. I have had cravings up the ying yang, I've had to make myself go to the gym, I am just burnt out and I'm not sure where it's coming from. If it's work, lack of sleep, working out or all of the above. I overate at dinner last night. Why? I don't know. I don't know why sometimes I do that. I know I'm going to fill like crap afterwards, I know it's not good for me. So then why? Am I sabatoging myself? If so, what am I afraid of? And if that's not it, am I just tired and loopy? Or maybe I'm just being too hard on myself. I tend to do that. It wasn't like I binged or anything, I just ate a whole sandwich at CPK, when I know I am full after a half. I hate it because I feel like my workout with Ashley was wasted. It's so frustrating sometimes. But all I can do is forget about it and do better today.
I did go to kickboxing class this morning despite my exhaustion. It was hard, I was so tired. I wanted to quit, but I didn't. I worked through the pain. I'm glad I did it. I didn't have the energy to do any extra cardio afterwards like I usually do, but I'm still satisfied. And I think I'll be ok the rest of the week on my eating.
Ashley is going to be gone next week and she gave me homework to take care of me. I've decided to stay home on Sunday instead of heading down to Spanaway. I need a day to sleep in and rest. And maybe spend some time with the new boy. Hee hee.
I've decided to mimick the workout Ashley had me do on Monday next week while she's gone. My legs have never felt better! Here it is:
Exercise: Weight: Reps:
Burpie with push up - 30sec x 15
Pliet Squat 10 lbs m. ball 30sec x 15
Mt. climbers - 30 sec x 15
Lunge walk - 2 laps
Jump Rope - 30 sec x 15
Bridges on ball - 30 sec x 15
It is possibly the hardest workout I've ever done. Make sure to do at least 30 min. of cardio before this if you dare!! ;) Burpies with push ups is where you jump out with your feet and then jump out, do a push up, jump in and then stand up. Bridges on ball is where you take the exercise ball and lie on your back with your feet on the ball. You then push in with the ball, lifting yourself with your legs. You're suppose to keep your hips up at all times while you're doing the in and out movement, but I could only lift my hips on the lift. This really works your hamstrings.
Yesterday we worked on the back, which is my favorite. My back is looking so nice these days, I just feel like I'm turning into a lady and it feels good. :)
I did go to kickboxing class this morning despite my exhaustion. It was hard, I was so tired. I wanted to quit, but I didn't. I worked through the pain. I'm glad I did it. I didn't have the energy to do any extra cardio afterwards like I usually do, but I'm still satisfied. And I think I'll be ok the rest of the week on my eating.
Ashley is going to be gone next week and she gave me homework to take care of me. I've decided to stay home on Sunday instead of heading down to Spanaway. I need a day to sleep in and rest. And maybe spend some time with the new boy. Hee hee.
I've decided to mimick the workout Ashley had me do on Monday next week while she's gone. My legs have never felt better! Here it is:
Exercise: Weight: Reps:
Burpie with push up - 30sec x 15
Pliet Squat 10 lbs m. ball 30sec x 15
Mt. climbers - 30 sec x 15
Lunge walk - 2 laps
Jump Rope - 30 sec x 15
Bridges on ball - 30 sec x 15
It is possibly the hardest workout I've ever done. Make sure to do at least 30 min. of cardio before this if you dare!! ;) Burpies with push ups is where you jump out with your feet and then jump out, do a push up, jump in and then stand up. Bridges on ball is where you take the exercise ball and lie on your back with your feet on the ball. You then push in with the ball, lifting yourself with your legs. You're suppose to keep your hips up at all times while you're doing the in and out movement, but I could only lift my hips on the lift. This really works your hamstrings.
Yesterday we worked on the back, which is my favorite. My back is looking so nice these days, I just feel like I'm turning into a lady and it feels good. :)
Saturday, June 16, 2007
Breast Stroke
Shirley! You are so sweet. Burpies are when you lean on your hands and jump out and then back in, stand and then do it all over again. And mountain climbers are when you are leaning on your hands and moving your feet back and forth on the ground. Those are hard to explain. :)
I went swimming today for the first time in months. I was going once every two weeks for awhile, but now that my pool is open I've decided to get back into it. I really just don't like driving to Bellevue to use a pool. It was kind of hard today since I haven't done it in so long. My goal was an hour and I did just under that. My routine was a lap of freestyle, lap of breast stroke (my favorite) and a lap of back stroke. With some kick practices in between 'cause you have to kick from your hips and not with your knees and it's hard to get down when you've been kicking with your knees all your life. Anyway, I'm glad I did it. The weird thing about swimming is that you have to change your breathing routine. You're suppose to breathe in through you nose and out your mouth in all other exercises, but with swimming you have to breathe in with your mouth and out with your mouth. That, and you smell like chlorine the rest of the day. :)
I hate it when I take my multi-vitamin and it makes me kind of nauseus (I never know how to spell that) for a bit. Bleh. Go away!!
Ashley wants to shoot for 5% in this next upcoming contest. I can do it!!
So, I didn't go to cycling class OR kickboxing class on Thur or Fri. I ended up taking Thur off from working out completely. It actually felt really good to take a day off. And I was just too tired to wake up at 4:30 am to get to cycling class by 6 on Friday. What are they thinking? But I did do my own kickboxing routine on Friday. I love having the kickboxing room all to myself. I bring in some cds and put the fan on and just do what I love. I listened to Garbage this time, it was awesome! And I did jump roping and mountain climbers and push-ups and of course a lot of punches and kicks. Loved it!!
I hope I have time to run before meeting my family tomorrow morning. That would give me 4 just cardio days this week. I might be too pooped after the Gwen Stefani concert tonight though. I'm excited! I hope it's a good show.
I went swimming today for the first time in months. I was going once every two weeks for awhile, but now that my pool is open I've decided to get back into it. I really just don't like driving to Bellevue to use a pool. It was kind of hard today since I haven't done it in so long. My goal was an hour and I did just under that. My routine was a lap of freestyle, lap of breast stroke (my favorite) and a lap of back stroke. With some kick practices in between 'cause you have to kick from your hips and not with your knees and it's hard to get down when you've been kicking with your knees all your life. Anyway, I'm glad I did it. The weird thing about swimming is that you have to change your breathing routine. You're suppose to breathe in through you nose and out your mouth in all other exercises, but with swimming you have to breathe in with your mouth and out with your mouth. That, and you smell like chlorine the rest of the day. :)
I hate it when I take my multi-vitamin and it makes me kind of nauseus (I never know how to spell that) for a bit. Bleh. Go away!!
Ashley wants to shoot for 5% in this next upcoming contest. I can do it!!
So, I didn't go to cycling class OR kickboxing class on Thur or Fri. I ended up taking Thur off from working out completely. It actually felt really good to take a day off. And I was just too tired to wake up at 4:30 am to get to cycling class by 6 on Friday. What are they thinking? But I did do my own kickboxing routine on Friday. I love having the kickboxing room all to myself. I bring in some cds and put the fan on and just do what I love. I listened to Garbage this time, it was awesome! And I did jump roping and mountain climbers and push-ups and of course a lot of punches and kicks. Loved it!!
I hope I have time to run before meeting my family tomorrow morning. That would give me 4 just cardio days this week. I might be too pooped after the Gwen Stefani concert tonight though. I'm excited! I hope it's a good show.
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Burpies!
Ahhhh man, I was called to the floor by the gym gods and I answered back y'all! I started off on the eliptical and went up to resistance 7. I did that for 5 minutes, which got my heartrate over 170, and then hopped on the bike for 10 minutes because that's when the soreness of me bum starts to mess with my mind. I did resistance 13 for most of it, but dipped to 12 for a minute here and there to give myself a rest. I then went back to the eliptical and did level 7 for 10 minutes. I was kind of already pooped by the time I met Ashley.
Ok, so I told Ashley on Monday that in kickboxing class, we do burpies and mountain climbers and I really wanted to get better at them 'cause I struggle with those type of exercises. Well, she delivered as usual. The ciruit today started off with 15 push-ups, then went to one minute of burpies, then to 15 minutes of chest pushes on level 55!, then to one minute of mountain climbers and then 15 tricep lifts with a medicine ball. Yeah, I did that circuit 3 times! Whew! It was so hard. And Ashley said to me that I shouldn't have pushed myself before a session with her, but I thought that was kind of wonky. Anyway, I got through it and I'm glad she incorporated those killer exercises because I would really like to improve in that area. She is such a positive spirit in my life. She wrote me an email today saying how well I did today and that I inspire her. I wish I could express to her how much she has helped me get through all of the tough times I've overcome after my last relationship. I can't thank her enough. I feel so lucky and blessed to have her in my life.
And I got great news that my gym is starting a summer fat burning contest that runs from the end of June to the end of August! I am super excited. I am shooting for 3%. Maybe I can even get to 4%! Yayyy!
Ok, so I told Ashley on Monday that in kickboxing class, we do burpies and mountain climbers and I really wanted to get better at them 'cause I struggle with those type of exercises. Well, she delivered as usual. The ciruit today started off with 15 push-ups, then went to one minute of burpies, then to 15 minutes of chest pushes on level 55!, then to one minute of mountain climbers and then 15 tricep lifts with a medicine ball. Yeah, I did that circuit 3 times! Whew! It was so hard. And Ashley said to me that I shouldn't have pushed myself before a session with her, but I thought that was kind of wonky. Anyway, I got through it and I'm glad she incorporated those killer exercises because I would really like to improve in that area. She is such a positive spirit in my life. She wrote me an email today saying how well I did today and that I inspire her. I wish I could express to her how much she has helped me get through all of the tough times I've overcome after my last relationship. I can't thank her enough. I feel so lucky and blessed to have her in my life.
And I got great news that my gym is starting a summer fat burning contest that runs from the end of June to the end of August! I am super excited. I am shooting for 3%. Maybe I can even get to 4%! Yayyy!
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Monday, June 11, 2007
The Push
There comes a time in every girl's fitness journey where she has to raise the bar. I have noticed that my cardio routines don't get my heart rate up as high as I need them to be and I have to change my routines. That means, harder, faster and more pain. But I gotta push through the pain!! I'm going to be brave this week and do a cycle class Friday morning. Holy moly, I'm scared. But I was scared when I first went to my kickboxing class and I love that so much, I do every week now. So this will be a great thing!
I'm on a new eating schedule. I was eating my fruit parfaits before the gym and then realized that I was really hungry afterwards and my banana and almonds just weren't cutting it. So this week I am eating an egg and a half piece of cheese before the gym and eating the parfait afterwards. So far so good. I usually eat lunch at 11:30 and it's now 12:30 and I'm still not that hungry.
I was surprised that I wanted to use the treadmill this morning after my run yesterday. My legs weren't sore at all from yesterday. My usual treadmill routine is 4 min. incline of 5, 1 min. incline of 0, jog for 1 min., 1 min. incline of 0, 2 min. incline of 5, 1 min. incline of 0, 1 min. of jogging etc. So this didn't produce the heart rate I needed this morning so I discussed it with Ashley during our session and she suggested doing 2 min. of walking and then 2 min. of jogging. I will try it next time I use the treadmill. And in general, I'm just going to have to up my resistance on all the machines now. Here comes the push ladies and gents!!
Ashley worked my back today and my lats feel awesome! I have noticed such a big difference in my arms and back lately, thanks to my lovely personal trainer. I hope I can work with her throughout this entire process. I wonder why we haven't done legs in awhile. Oh, I didn't tell you about the ab workout she had me do. You lie on your back with an exercise ball. You then spread your legs wide, lift them up to a 90 degree angle as you life the ball from your head to between your legs, you then shut your legs and as you go down, you lower the ball down to over your head. Oh...my...gollygeewillickers. It was hard! But I felt it quickly and that is my kind of exercise!!
Just going to do cardio tomorrow. Ashley wants me to do 4 days of just cardio now. There's just not enough days in a week to do everything you want to. I can't remember the last time I did Pilates and it makes me sads...
I'm on a new eating schedule. I was eating my fruit parfaits before the gym and then realized that I was really hungry afterwards and my banana and almonds just weren't cutting it. So this week I am eating an egg and a half piece of cheese before the gym and eating the parfait afterwards. So far so good. I usually eat lunch at 11:30 and it's now 12:30 and I'm still not that hungry.
I was surprised that I wanted to use the treadmill this morning after my run yesterday. My legs weren't sore at all from yesterday. My usual treadmill routine is 4 min. incline of 5, 1 min. incline of 0, jog for 1 min., 1 min. incline of 0, 2 min. incline of 5, 1 min. incline of 0, 1 min. of jogging etc. So this didn't produce the heart rate I needed this morning so I discussed it with Ashley during our session and she suggested doing 2 min. of walking and then 2 min. of jogging. I will try it next time I use the treadmill. And in general, I'm just going to have to up my resistance on all the machines now. Here comes the push ladies and gents!!
Ashley worked my back today and my lats feel awesome! I have noticed such a big difference in my arms and back lately, thanks to my lovely personal trainer. I hope I can work with her throughout this entire process. I wonder why we haven't done legs in awhile. Oh, I didn't tell you about the ab workout she had me do. You lie on your back with an exercise ball. You then spread your legs wide, lift them up to a 90 degree angle as you life the ball from your head to between your legs, you then shut your legs and as you go down, you lower the ball down to over your head. Oh...my...gollygeewillickers. It was hard! But I felt it quickly and that is my kind of exercise!!
Just going to do cardio tomorrow. Ashley wants me to do 4 days of just cardio now. There's just not enough days in a week to do everything you want to. I can't remember the last time I did Pilates and it makes me sads...
Thursday, June 7, 2007
Cravings
You know you're pmsing when you go to Bartell's for a snack and get a small thing of reduced chocolate milk and a small bag of white cheddar popcorn. ;) I told my co-worker what I had yesterday and he was like 'That seriously makes me want to throw up.' Ha ha!
This week has been hard. I was walking back from the gym this morning and I saw corn dogs on a bus ad and was about to jump through the bus to get one. And then I saw a picture of chocolate chip cookies!! Ugghhhhh! I love chocolate chip cookies. But I stayed strong and will fight these urges until they go away. Take a deep breath and count to ten.
I feel so good today, which is a relief because I was at the breaking point yesterday. I can't remember ever being that tired before. And for some reason, Ashley worked my arms again and they were still sore from Monday! We worked my shoulders mostly, but then she pulled the big guns out and made me do more tricep work. Oh...my...word. But I got through it and felt good. It didn't wake me up at all though.
I made it to kick-boxing class this morning and it was a doosey! But it was fun. I really need to get better at mountain climbers, I suck at those. Can you do push-ups for an entire minute? I can!! Owie zowie, that hurt. After class, I rode the bike for 10 minutes and then did a bunch of ab/leg work. I ended up working out for an hour and a half today. I didn't even mean to. It was worth it though 'cause I feel better than I have in a long time! It feels good to not be walking around her like a zombie. :)
This week has been hard. I was walking back from the gym this morning and I saw corn dogs on a bus ad and was about to jump through the bus to get one. And then I saw a picture of chocolate chip cookies!! Ugghhhhh! I love chocolate chip cookies. But I stayed strong and will fight these urges until they go away. Take a deep breath and count to ten.
I feel so good today, which is a relief because I was at the breaking point yesterday. I can't remember ever being that tired before. And for some reason, Ashley worked my arms again and they were still sore from Monday! We worked my shoulders mostly, but then she pulled the big guns out and made me do more tricep work. Oh...my...word. But I got through it and felt good. It didn't wake me up at all though.
I made it to kick-boxing class this morning and it was a doosey! But it was fun. I really need to get better at mountain climbers, I suck at those. Can you do push-ups for an entire minute? I can!! Owie zowie, that hurt. After class, I rode the bike for 10 minutes and then did a bunch of ab/leg work. I ended up working out for an hour and a half today. I didn't even mean to. It was worth it though 'cause I feel better than I have in a long time! It feels good to not be walking around her like a zombie. :)
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
Bench Press
I can't believe I got through my workout yesterday morning. I am still just pooped from the riguorous weekend. It took me awhile to get out of bed yesterday morning so I didn't step on the eliptical until 10 after 7. I only got 20 minutes of cardio in. Poop. And then this is the circuit Ashley made me do:
-15 bench press reps (50 pounds!)
-15 normal decline bench crunch reps
-15 tricep press reps (25 pounds!)
-15 decline bench w/ 5 pound weight punch reps (working the obliques)
-15 push-ups
After doing that cirucuit 3 times it was...
-15 cable fly reps
-15 cable lat pull reps on each arm
3 TIMES!
I was exhausted. And I could barely move my arms.
The scale keeps going up this week. I am wondering what's going on so I am being stricter on my diet and making sure I get enough sleep. I don't feel like I'm gaining weight, but it very well could be muscle mass or my scale. The scale fluctuates up to 8 pounds. I'm thinking maybe I shouldn't be weighing myself everyday, but for some reason, I feel a need.
I took a much needed break from working out today. I am so tired and cranky and just want to go to bed. I can't wait to sleep.
-15 bench press reps (50 pounds!)
-15 normal decline bench crunch reps
-15 tricep press reps (25 pounds!)
-15 decline bench w/ 5 pound weight punch reps (working the obliques)
-15 push-ups
After doing that cirucuit 3 times it was...
-15 cable fly reps
-15 cable lat pull reps on each arm
3 TIMES!
I was exhausted. And I could barely move my arms.
The scale keeps going up this week. I am wondering what's going on so I am being stricter on my diet and making sure I get enough sleep. I don't feel like I'm gaining weight, but it very well could be muscle mass or my scale. The scale fluctuates up to 8 pounds. I'm thinking maybe I shouldn't be weighing myself everyday, but for some reason, I feel a need.
I took a much needed break from working out today. I am so tired and cranky and just want to go to bed. I can't wait to sleep.
Sunday, June 3, 2007
Pooped!
This weekend was the Relay for Life supporting the American Cancer Society. I joined a team with my co-workers and we spent all weekend together at this event. We had half an hour shifts for a continuous 24 hour period. Most of us only got a couple of hours of sleep, if any. One of our members, Kurt, beat testicle cancer a few months ago. It was great to be there supporting him and have him experience this as a survivor.
I was actually surprised how big this event was. There were a lot of people there. The weather was awesome, but it didn't make running around the track easy. I ran the whole time for my first shift and ended up getting heat stroke. It wasn't that bad and I was really proud that I was able to run for a half an hour straight in 80 degree weather. I was really taken back at the support of my co-workers for accomplishing that. I ran a lot on Saturday during my shifts. It was kind of crazy.
I didn't run at all today. I was pretty beat. I only got 3 hours of sleep last night. Each team is supposed to have at least one member on the track at all periods of time so there wasn't much time for us to get much more than a few hours of rest. But we had a great time. I ended up leaving a tad early while they were doing the finale ceremony. I was so tired. And of course it was hot and my apartment is like hell when it's hot. I came home, took a shower and putzed around the computer for awhile before taking a nap.
I was really warm from all the sun I have gotten this weekend. I ended up going down to my pool and swam laps for a half an hour this evening. I have no idea how I had energy to do this, but it felt good. I haven't been swimming regularly and I miss it.
I hope I got below 240 pounds this weekend. We shall see tomorrow morning. It was a good, but exhausting weekend. And tomorrow morning I have session with my personal trainer. I haven't not worked out in over a week. Eeek!
I was actually surprised how big this event was. There were a lot of people there. The weather was awesome, but it didn't make running around the track easy. I ran the whole time for my first shift and ended up getting heat stroke. It wasn't that bad and I was really proud that I was able to run for a half an hour straight in 80 degree weather. I was really taken back at the support of my co-workers for accomplishing that. I ran a lot on Saturday during my shifts. It was kind of crazy.
I didn't run at all today. I was pretty beat. I only got 3 hours of sleep last night. Each team is supposed to have at least one member on the track at all periods of time so there wasn't much time for us to get much more than a few hours of rest. But we had a great time. I ended up leaving a tad early while they were doing the finale ceremony. I was so tired. And of course it was hot and my apartment is like hell when it's hot. I came home, took a shower and putzed around the computer for awhile before taking a nap.
I was really warm from all the sun I have gotten this weekend. I ended up going down to my pool and swam laps for a half an hour this evening. I have no idea how I had energy to do this, but it felt good. I haven't been swimming regularly and I miss it.
I hope I got below 240 pounds this weekend. We shall see tomorrow morning. It was a good, but exhausting weekend. And tomorrow morning I have session with my personal trainer. I haven't not worked out in over a week. Eeek!
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