Trouble at the Storm Front

I am so angry! So, so, so, so angry!! I have worked so hard in my field and I just continue to get brutalized. I am sick of project managers making assumptions about me and my work. Have the balls to come to me and clear it up!

I just want to throw my business cards at her freakin' head! Why do I keep running into these cold women in this field? I swear they forget what it's like to be a young engineer. How the hell am I suppose to learn if you won't teach me?

I want to quit, but I know that's not going to do me or anyone else any good. I will continue to fight through this hardship. Even if I just want to curl up in a ball and cry.

I looked up to her. I wanted to learn from her, why did she quit on me? I deserve better than that. I worked hard for her.

Crazy Times

This week has been very eventful and it's only Wednesday! My best friend had her baby yesterday. It was a planned C-section so I knew it was coming, but I had no idea the emotion I would have behind it. I received her last email before giving birth early yesterday and I teared up. I was sad for losing the friendship I've known all these years; yet, excited for a new chapter.

As soon as I got a call from Jeremy giving me an update, all those emotions went away and I was very excited. I didn't think I was actually going to meet the little tyke yesterday, but Matt and I ended up going to visit after work. I have to say Mikayla is a beautiful baby. She's sooooo cute. I never thought I'd see the day where Debbie Deany Weany would have a child. But she did and I'm proud of her.

So yeah, I sacrificed my workout yesterday to meet my best friend's baby. And I'd do it again in a heart beat! It was wonderful!

Oops I...

...over did it again.

Well, once again I totally over did it at the gym today. I got so sick that I couldn't get ready afterwards so Matt and I could go out on the town. Instead we drove around while I laid back until I felt well enough to eat and stand up.

This sickness has got to stop! I don't normally over do it as much as I did today, but I always feel somewhat sick afterwards. I am really under the idealism that you don't have to push yourself that much to get results. But I was trained for months by personal trainers to work this hard.

So Matt and I made a new rule today: no grimacing. If you are grimacing while lifting weights, you are working too hard.

I know part of the reason I over did it today is because I haven't worked out at all this week and I was trying to make up for it. I haven't been feeling well the last couple of weeks. I've really allowed my emotional stress get the best of me. But I've been really even on my diet and that's great.

Here are the positive things I've done this week:

-Drank only one soda (I've been substituting with green tea or jasmine green tea, which is my new favorite tea)
-Making sure I eat a lot of fruit during the day
-Didn't eat any delicious sweets at our company picnic
-Didn't get a free small popcorn at the movies

My goals next week are to workout 4 times and loose 2 pounds.